Do you ever feel like you just don’t measure up?
Lately I have found myself slipping back into an ugly pit I know so well once again. It is a funny thing really because you don’t notice it right away, it is a slow slope. You don’t even realize you are dancing along the edge of the pit until you lose your footing and then it is too late because you’ve fallen head first into the mucky yucky place called the Pit of Compare.
I must admit to you that I have found myself here all too often. In fact I have spent so much time here in the past that I even decorated and hung pictures on the walls to make it feel less pit like. I tell you this because I should have recognized this place sooner, after all it is a place that I have created with my own thoughts for myself. It is almost a comfortable place in the beginning of my stay, but it always turns into a prison that keeps me from enjoying life and other people.
We do it in all areas of our lives. Women are the worst because we are taught from an early age that we must be the sweetest, prettiest, most likable, smartest….
And when we make the mistake of looking around us, we might notice that we don’t seem to measure up.
It is easy in the blogging world to begin comparing little things. THAT blogger has it all together.
Her blog looks immaculate.
Her posts are perfect.
She gets the best offers.
She runs her blog business without any errors or setbacks, while I can barely keep up with my email each day.
I need to remind myself that this place is for all of you, I cannot compare my blog to any other because then it would become a copy of someone else and not what you have come here hoping to find.
The reality is the only person we need to compare ourselves to is ourself. The people we are comparing ourselves to are only giving you a glimpse at the whole picture anyway, and usually it is the best view of themselves that they are sharing.
If I make a batch of brownies and include a huge amount of pepper into them you may never know. If I show you a beautifully edited photo of my brownies you may think I make some amazing brownies. But the reality is that you are only seeing a picture of the reality and they are in reality inedible.
(By the way, I DO happen to make some mean brownies)
But the point is that we compare our whole selves to a glimpse we see of someone else. That’s really not a fair comparison then, it is just a trap.
When I do finally realize I am in the Pit of Compare it doesn’t usually take me very long to get out. There is a ladder that I have discreetly placed against the wall and all I need to do is remember it is there and climb out. If you are finding yourself in the Pit of Compare, remember there is no other person who can fully do the job of being you!
It also helps me if I try to come up with a list of three things I am proud of in myself even if noone else would agree 🙂